kristin has been a bad kristin
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize