I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I just forgot I was standing up.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
