Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
