You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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