I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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