I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
