can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
