ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
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