I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
