And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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