I need help removing her.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
