Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Randomize
