it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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