I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
