your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
