That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Randomize
