My hair reeks of homosexuality.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
She bit a glass in half.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
In other news, I just burned my penis
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
You ate ashes out of my bong
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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