we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
