oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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