I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
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