Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i think i have herpe
just one?
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
