Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
