I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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