I wanna passion pit in your ass
it hurts more in the daytime
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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