Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
