if i can run in heels then i can drive
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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