Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
