Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize
