Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
