That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
