4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
