At least make sure they are 18
Why
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
