So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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