i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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