ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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