the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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