My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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