Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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