i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
