I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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