He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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