Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
