I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
