Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
