love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
