The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm passing your future prison.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
