he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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