I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
