you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
