if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
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