Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize
