Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
